your name pls?

so just msged someone i had completely given the cold shoulder to when was dating last ex/guy/buddy. saw him online on the online dating site and apologized for being a jerk and blowing him off completely. i doubt he'll read it and probably just deleted it. regardless, i felt like i needed to apologize as that was not cool of me and i obviously did not have the balls to say ya sorry i'm actually just not interested. for all i know he could reply back and say f u or he might just call me a sorry sob. ... i just hope i got his name right... shiet...

No shame

In crying in the middle of the food court while being comforted by a friend. There's something to be said about not wearing glasses b/c if the world you see is blurry that means they can't really see you right? And therefore cannot see the obvious signs of distress, like being in a blurry bubble...

single for so long

also... when they had been single for sooOooo long and not use to having to constantly nurture or care about another person's feelings and all of a sudden is thrown into a seemingly wonderful caring relationship, they WILL panic. they will feel out of their comfort zone. they will retreat and you shall never capture them again. wild, selfish, lazy beasts.

what it means by slow

when he said he wants to slow it down, take it slow, we've rushed into things, a bit overwhelming. it means, ppl, he does not want to be in a relationship. don't let him fool you. it's not going to be happen. only until that point has reached can you fully relax, not feel anxious about having to please, and second guess yourself.

i'm sick of dating

Beets

Turn your poop...or pee a rasberry red... I thought I had a bowel infection.

Hairless

I can't tell if my director's legs and arms are shaved as he's one of the most smoothest skin, hairless big strapping male I've seen...it scares me. Reminds me of a ken doll.

Don't touch me

Pet peeve. When ppl don't mind their space when sitting next to me on the train. I don't care if you're bigger, tuck your elbows in b/c feeling your hairy arm touch mine grosses me out. Think of the invisible divider b/w our seats as a force field...that will taze you if you don't mind. your. SPACE!!!

watch her pose

this is a video of super model coco rocha (CANADIANNN HOLLAAHHH or EH?!!?) modeling in reuben's apartment w/ reuben's sketching her at the same time... amazing.

watch her pose in this video... there's something about the way she moves, that's so fluid, natural, it literally took my breath away b/c when you see the final photos you realize, how much work it takes to create a beautiful image, yet it looks effortless when she does it!

via coco

Old ppl

Old chinese ppl are quicker than you think! A couple beat me to a seat on the train...mofos

Don't push me

And if you push me out of your way to exit the train and I mean try to walk right thru me, then don't be so surprised if I call you fat cunt cow... Just saying...

Dear google blogspot

Pls make your blogspots more blackberry mobile friendly for the browser...it would be MUCH appreciated. Danke
PS remove the bloody recaptcha tool!!!

Commenting difficulties...

Just so you know, commenting on your blog requires me to fill in those silly recaptcha forms, you know, where the words look silly and squiggly to make sure you're not some auto-generated spammer typing stuff... And oh ya I do it on my blackberry of all things! Can't tell if it's an epic fail or a major feat of ball scrolling and typing on a tiny input type box hehe

Closure

Started talking to an ex again, one from last fall...got some closure on how that ended. Admittedly, I was unrealistic w/ the situation, he was leaving and I was looking for a relationship. Then again, he was extremely distant and not returning any iota of affection that I would put out. The good feeling came when he said he knew he had something great, but lost it. I know that was a small blip in life, but it's nice to know that it isn't all in my head and one sided when I show affection and emotion to ppl.

Drinks

I'm not a drunk, but I can see why this glorious drunk buzz is greatly desired. I. feel..good...

Sighhh

Of relief as I get to sit down on the last 1/3 of the trip into work. Skyrocket heels and standing on a rocky train don't really mix...but they're so pretty and I feel tall!!

British vibe plays tennis!

Omg...I really want to turn around and project my tennis/british enthusiasm onto them... Too much? Maybe I should work on that overwhelming smothering vibe I've got going on...

British vibe

There are some super hot british guys standing behind me in the lunch line. They look like GQ superstars. I'm drooling, which doesn't help w/ the existing hunger pains.

Slow it down

So we had "the talk" b/c I felt he was being distant and I had no idea why...he said he wants to slow it down, as in...I don't know what...I do know it means not seeing anyone else, but I think it also means I can't think of him as "my guy" quite yet...will be hard to start again or go backwards...
Should be good for us as we know each other well via email and msging, but like he says that's not quite real as we barely know each other face to face... Urgh